Friday, December 30, 2016

HAPPY - The Rebuilding of Crash thanks to SURE WILL and DDP YOGA - Week Two

HAPPY - The Rebuilding of Crash thanks to SURE WILL and DDP YOGA - Week Two

Here we are at the end of week #2. I guess we could have used KISS' "Deuce" as the theme! ;-) "Happy" works MUCH better, no offense to "THE HOTTEST BAND IN THE WORLD"! They know they're one of my favs!

So, where does "Happy" come from you ask? Well, pour a tall drink, get cozy and I'll tell ya'all the story....about a man named Jed, a poor Mountaineer who barely kept his family fed, then one day he was shootin at some food and up through the ground come a bubblin crude. 

Oh c'mon, that was funny! Just be thankful I typed out the REAL version and not the XXX version I performed in Mrs. Criss' (real name, not kidding, no relation to ex-KISS drummer) "Creative Thinking" class in 1995 @ Goddard High School in Goddard, KS. I was being creative so Mrs. Criss did not bat an eye.

Enough sidetracking, week #2 has a "Happy" theme because I am just that, H-A-P-P-Y! It has been a good week. Sold some stuff and was able to buy that incumbent bike, celebrated Christmas for the first time since I shunned it back in 1992 due to materialistic and hypocritical religious family members. I even hosted a lil' Christmas shindig for Josh, Crystal, Parker and I. 

This Sunday, my nephew Parker and I are having our first "Cowabunga Dude Sleepover" here at Casa de Crash. We will watch TMNT's, make homeade pizza, drink pop, eat candy and have a burping & farting contest! Ohhh, yes, he will be learning bad words too!

I've continued to do my morning DDP YOGA, arm strength and lung opening workouts & been vigilant about remembering to take my meds. Cutting down on oxygen and seeing an increase in how long I get walk around without leaning on something or sitting down. Makes me happy, my personal physical goats are getting closer to being accomolished.

The other night, my nephew Parker, was out for his nightly walk and decided to stop in & give me a two-fold surprise. One being his presence and two being an ornament he bought at Hobby Lobby with some of his piggy bank money. He even wrote Crash on the banner. We work on his spelling, reading and writing ALOT. He is way ahead of the curve for his age & that makes me HAPPY! I did get a bit teary eyed when I opened the ornament. He insisted it be wrapped so I could unwrap a surprise!

After they left, I got to thinking about my nephew Zander who died on 07.04.2014 from MAJOR heart issues after his body rejected his heart transplant. He was a TMNT buddy too! I MC'd his celebration of life per his wishes and believe he is my "guardian turtle-angel"!

Here's the story of Zander's 12" Mikey that I inherited! Cowabunga to my lil' huggin' buddy in the great beyond!

I've been catching up on my backlogged product reviews and transcribing interviews that have collected dust while in-and-out of ICU's. This week I was watching YouTube interviews with, IMO, THE WORLDS GREATEST DRUMMER, Mr. Kenny Aronoff and discovered one from AfterBuzzTV hosted by a James Lott, Jr. OMG, I LOVE his vibe and interview style. You can tell he's very knowledgeable about AND loves the subject at hand. That is how I TRY to model my writing as I refuse to write negative reviews or conduct interviews with artists I dislike.

I did a Google search on Mr. Lott and quickly liked or subscribed to his various social media outlets. I've also watched and/or listened to many of his interviews with a diverse selection of artists. Wow! #BlownAway 

Although I've been writing about my love of music since 1991, I feel that you must continue to learn and I feel I could learn ALOT from James Lott, Jr. I wrote him on Facebook to express my admiration for his style. He quickly replied. I told him I wrote and he replied he'd like to read my work so I sent him the links to my latest album review at LRI & the link to this blog.

Talk about humbling when someone you admire who has lightyears more experience in the field you both love asks to read your work!

#TotalFanBoyMoment & #Happy

Lyrics to HAPPY.....

[Verse 1:]
It might seem crazy what I'm about to say
Sunshine she's here, you can take a break
I'm a hot air balloon that could go to space
With the air, like I don't care, baby, by the way


Because I'm happy
Clap along if you feel like a room without a roof
Because I'm happy
Clap along if you feel like happiness is the truth
Because I'm happy
Clap along if you know what happiness is to you
Because I'm happy
Clap along if you feel like that's what you wanna do

[Verse 2:]
Here come bad news talking this and that, yeah,
Well, give me all you got, and don't hold it back, yeah,
Well, I should probably warn you I'll be just fine, yeah,
No offense to you, don't waste your time
Here's why



Bring me down
Can't nothing
Bring me down
My level's too high
Bring me down
Can't nothing
Bring me down
I said (let me tell you now)
Bring me down
Can't nothing
Bring me down
My level's too high
Bring me down
Can't nothing
Bring me down
I said

[Chorus 2x]


(Happy) [repeats]
Bring me down... can't nothing...
Bring me down... my level's too high...
Bring me down... can't nothing...
Bring me down, I said (let me tell you now)

[Chorus 2x]



See ya'all next week!



Monday, December 26, 2016

More Than One Way Home - The Rebuilding of Crash thanks to SURE WILL and DDP YOGA - Week One - Volume B

Howdy Peeps!

Did everyone survive the stressful part of The HoliDaze? New Years Eve is coming up this weekend! Please, be safe and responsible! Stay home and party & DO NOT DRIVE!

However, if you must drive, GET A DESIGNATED DRIVER or CALL 911, they have the numbers to charities willing to give intoxicated people a free ride home!

.....and in all seriousness, STAY AWAY FROM THE FRUITCAKE! Dangerous & deadly stuff!

As you can see, I'm doing a Vol. B to week #1's Blog entitled "More Than One Way Home - The Rebuilding of Crash thanks to SURE WILL and DDP YOGA - Week One - Volume B"

.....c'mon Blitzed, c'mon Axe, c'mon Smashed, c'mon Crush, c'mon Dunkin' Dohickie....and the rest of my blazin' n' cheap sleigh to the titty bar this Jolly St. *ick wants to go!

The Holiday Season usually leads to reflection. Since 1992, The Holiday Season was blackballed from my life due to the hypocrisies against the true meaning of & MY long-standing meaning of "The Holiday Season".....  family, food, laughter, memories, NFL, etc. 

Sadly, hypocrosies from religious,  born-again religious and materialistic religious people ruined the holidays for me. 

I TOLERATED Thanksgiving as that was my late Mother Faye's FAVORITE holiday as no gifts were involved therefore no bullshit expectations except for a feast and laughter. I continued to celebrate it with the Catlin & Smith clan post her dying in 2005 as they are my "other family"!

Too many hypocrites come out of the woodwork around Christmas! Between the bible thumping hypocrites and materialistic hypocrites, Christmas could FOREVER FU*K OFF, IMO! 

Until this year.....between my four toe-to-toe and ongoing fights w/ THE MAN IN BLACK aka THE GRIM REAPER & how much Christmas means to my 5 year nephew Parker & how he hoped I'd be ok so we could hang out on Christmas, I decided not to unpack my Grinch costume and go as me, Unkle Crash, this year....2016!

The Unkle Crash for Christmas went well, I hosted a mini-Christmas here at Casa de Crash-Burdett this year, complete w/ a LITTLE gift exchange, a meal provided by Josh and the other family. Sadly, due to not being 101% able due to health & not be 101% moved from Coldwater, the decorations were lacking to say the least!

Christmas 2017 at Casa de Crash-Burdett will be LARGE AND IN CHARGE & NO! The decorations will not be lacking here! 

Think Griswald's! *insert evil laugh*

Onto reflections, in the last calendar year.....I checked off a major bucketlist item by seeing a Green Bay Packers game on 12.13.2015 at Lambeau Field! 

I FEEL I am super close to landing my ultimate bucketlist interview that I've tried landing for twelve (12) years w/ Mr. John Fogerty/Creedence Clearwater Revival! 

That would make all the years, 25+ to be exact, scribbling away w/ that #2 Pencil n' Big Chief tablet & typing my fingers into nubs beyond worth it to sit down in person or on the phone with THE GREATEST Songwriter, EVER.....MR. JOHN FOGERTY! 

I am hoping my parents, Dorothy Crafton & Omar D. Crafton will be with me IF a face-to-face is APPROVED by his Management and PR people!

I also reflected on the friends who have blackballed themselves from my life for whatever reasons, SaraBeara & MarMar! I know SaraBeara has issues with how she perceives I pulled off my hospitalization in May but for legal reasons, it had to be done that way! Too bad if she don't agree! I didn't agree w/ certain choices she mafe that were negatively impacted her life but I stood by her, ALWAYS! I guess our 13 years of friendship WAS NOT a TWO WAY STREET! šŸ˜¢

As far as MarMar goes, I missed her wedding due to my mistake of asking for the wrong day off plus she had a beautiful healthy baby girl in May 2016 & is super busy as a wife n' Mommy so no harm there PLUS she did return Christmas yesterday wishing them all a Merry Christmas! Life gets in the way sometimes but I do miss my BFF!

Sadly, hypocrisy reared its ugly head in the form of a devout Christian, my cousin Davidfor whom I had an agreement to disagree with over our beliefs. 

Unfortunately, he seemed to have forgot one of his Holiness' commandments from THE GOOD BOOK,  I think that's where they're jotted down, about loving everyone and preceeded to tell me to remove MY post from MY page!

Before I could tell him "Don't let the door hit ya where the GOOD LORD split ya!" He probably sensed I'd bring down some UNHOLY WRATH upon him on MY page & blocked me. I won't BLOCK anyone for anything on my page but bet yer ass I will unfriend you if you disrespect my page, my wishes or my family and friends! Three strikes & you are out but 2nd chances can be earned!

Not all was bad in 2K16, I've got a new lease and life to start here in Burdett, I'm no longer Comanche Co's endentured servant and bitch, I'm firing up my new career as my own boss, I got to see a dear old friend after 26 years & meet her super cool hubby over lunch.....take a bow Gina Carson Baxter & Mr. Curtis Baxter who continues to serve this GREAT country I LOVE, THE U.S.A.! Thank you, Mr. Baxter & welcome home from your previous assignment in Cleveland, OH.

With the help of Cassie Zeiner, I was able to pull a "fast one" on my old Oaklawn/music professor/lifelong mentor, Mr. Mike Zeiner! I'd LOVE to post the video Cassie shot of "the dirty deed" but that will remain a private cherish moment amongst us!

Over the last few weeks, I fell back in love with Christmas music thanks to albums from Buzzy James, The Brian Setzer Orchestra & Trans-Siberian Orchestra!

This week, thanks to my nephew Andrew and Josh's brother-in-law, I got my new incumbent exercise bike so I can ride and type till I ware out! It goes into service the next few days! Anybody got tools? :-P

Today, I was listening to my 1st LOVE......THE BLUES when an ol' fav my Keb' Mo' came on! It took me back to the good parts of growing up in Oaklawn and Long Beach & to Christmas' in Haysville with my Aunt Marie Felix, Veda Hogue, David, Unkle Bill (R.I.P.) & the various dogs, and to friends who entered the great beyond too soon over the years!

It just reminds us that there IS more than one way home!

Much Love,
Crash Crafton


Wednesday, December 21, 2016

Rich Man - The Rebuilding of Crash thanks to SURE WILL and DDP YOGA

To my peeps:

Here's the condensed version of my life from 11.29.2016 to 12.21.2016 but the juicy bits are bet this italicized part!

[Start Rant]

From 11.29.16 to 12.9.16 I was in ICU @ Hays, KS. On 12.10.16, I received a certified letter dated 12.01.2016 from my employer stating I was FIRED!

I worked for the Comanche County Sheriff's Office where I was a 911 Telecommunications Officer and Deputized for 9 years. 2007-2016. 

I'm selling stuff because they denied me for unemployment only after I had to move in with Brother in Burdett because I could no longer pay rent and utilities for my home in Coldwater.

######### [End Rant]

The Juicy Bits:

I've been thinking about everything that has went down since September 29, 2016 when I had to leave my home in Coldwater to move in with Josh, my "Brother from another Mother and his family" because I could not adequately care for myself in my condition & those who had been helping me with chores, shopping and errands had shunned me due to "the game of political hot potato lead by my employer".

I fought until November 27th but my condition was growing to the point of deadly. My 21 year old Nephew read me the riot act that I was "a selfish asshole who was giving up & would die soon!". He was right BUT he lit a fire under my fat ass & 911 was called. I was transported to Larned who transferred me to Cardiac intensive care (C-ICU) a few hours after arriving at the Medical (!) Hospital in Larned!

I spent two (2) weeks in C-ICU Diuresing. Upon discharge, I'd lost 93 lbs Diuresing in C-ICU. That is 43 Liters of fluid pulled from around my heart and lungs! Something else sped my recovery and quicker-than-expected discharge from C-ICU, SURE WILL and DDP YOGA! WTF is DDP YOGA, right? The answer is at the end of the rest of the story! ;-)

On December, I used my AFLAC reimbursement check of $1200 to rent my own house in Burdett. It's just a block from Josh. I also paid bills, set up utilities and bought basic necessities and POOF!, $1200 was G-O-N-E!

However, my PRIDE was boosted as Josh, his wife Crystal and I walked, under my own power after the snowstorm let up around noon on December 17th into Casa de Crash at 407 Elm St. in Burdett, KS.


Many have asked since I am unable to work for the immediate future and since Comanche Co. (CMCO) DENIED my request for unemployment benefits that was taken out of every paycheck for the NINE years I was employed by CMCO. How will I make money in the coming few months. Well, I'm selling off MUSIC MEMORABILIA on Facebook via a photo album on my page called "For Sale", check it out in my photo folders.

Talk about re-paying someone who was loyal to their employer.

I wasn't fired for calling my immediate supervisor, Glennda K. Burt, a two-faced cunt for disseminating my private medical info via Skype Chat on COUNTY COMPUTERS at the CMCO Sheriff's Office during COUNTY TIME to your lil "Skype Boy Toy" who seemed to be receiving the sexting treatment while your late husband MIKE BURT was DYING.

NO WONDER MIKE BURT'S BEST FRIEND, the late Rev. Floyd Starr II warned me in 2007 that "Watch out for Glennda as she'll cut your throat first chance she can. She is a deceitful back stabbing cunt! Now I see why Mike Burt drank and fucked around on Glennda through the majority of their marriage!"

Hmmmm, who would know such intimate BURT FAMILY details but Mike Burt's spiritual guru, mentor and best friend, Rev. Floyd Starr II? My heart breaks for the BURT CHILDREN; Rebecca, Eric and Michelle because you have them snowballed to?

Also, why only after Mike died did you get gastric sleeve surgery then finally go on vacation after 25+ years? Was it because you finally saved up enough money from falsifying your COMANCHE COUNTY TIMESHEETS? You know, coming in to surf the internet or "bs" with whoever was working then writing it down as you worked. You did this for multiple hours every day you were off? Or.... Did your "Skype Boy Toy" pay for the surgery and vacation, not your brother as you claimed because as a brother, if I had the money to save your life, I would have done it when you sat around & became 600+ pounds not after your husband of 30+ years heart gave out while he lay in a bed alone in the living room not in the bedroom your shared.....odd!

OUTGOING SHERIFF MICHAEL MCMORAN & UNDERSHERIFF JESSE BRUMBAUGH witnessed her do it because she forgot to log out when I came to work & us three watched it live in the office yet THE COUNTY & THE SHERIFF never wrote her up or fired her but I WAS FIRED FOR INCAPACITATION! #FAIR

Let's end this blog entitled "Rich Man - The Rebuilding of Crash thanks to SURE WILL and DDP YOGA" on a few high notes.....

My friends, the Premiere Kansas Party Band, THIEF will be hosting "The Crash Benefit Bash".... an all-ages/no alcohol allowed VALENTINE'S DAY benefit concert and dance here at Burdett's American Legion Building on February 18, 2017.

A banking account/PayPal address has been set up for donations at

from now until March 1, 2017! As a rocker friend told me over my initial refusal to all the benefit, "Dammit Crash! They aren't giving you a HAND OUT, they are offering a HAND UP!" #ValidPoint

Onto DDP YOGA! I am in LOVE with the little I know about it and wish I could take advantage of the 25% OFF @ THE DDP YOGA HOLIDAY SALE because I'd order the $80 DDP YOGA MAX PACK but what $$$ I earn goes to my cost of living until I get an insurance check my the 15th of January! As they say, a penny saved is a penny earned & right now, I need ALL the pennies I can EARN!

EVERY FRIDAY-ish, I'm going to keep everyone posted on my progress via THIS BLOG that I'll share on Facebook and Twitter. Please follow my journey to greater health and independence!



You Can Do This!

Diamond Dallas Page originally developed DDP YOGA for athletes like himself who had suffered years of injuries due to high impact sports.  For the first 42 years of his life, Dallas was a guy who "wouldn't be caught dead" doing yoga, or anything like it.

When he ruptured his L4 and L5 spinal discs during the height of his professional wrestling career, he was so desperate to keep his childhood dream alive, he was willing to try anything.  So he tried yoga for the first time in his life.

Because Dallas (DDP) had so much experience in many other areas of fitness, he quickly learned how different yoga was from traditional workouts; soon, he started mixing elements of yoga with his rehab as well as traditional workout principles.  For almost a decade, DDP has refined his program and has become a master at teaching it to others, as well as motivating individuals to believe that anything is possible with dedication and hard work.

Along the way, Dallas learned that very deconditioned men and women could do DDP YOGA as well -- he was amazed to see stories of people doing DDP YOGA losing literally hundreds of pounds!  As Dallas puts it, "weight loss just happens to be a really AWESOME side effect of DDP YOGA!"

DDP YOGA combines the very best of yoga, traditional fitness, sports therapy and dynamic resistance to create one of the most effective fitness plans in existence today. It allows anyone to:

Get a kick-ass cardio workout!

Increase flexibility!

Strengthen core muscles!

Experience almost no joint impact!

DDP YOGA is CardiYoga!

The main benefits are body fat loss, lean muscle growth, and improved cardiovascular performance, without placing undue stress on the joints.  DDP YOGA is currently used by professional football players, more than 40 professional wrestlers, MMA fighters, and regular, everyday people who want to perform at optimum levels and place themselves in the best position to improve their quality of life.  At the same time, morbidly obese individuals have inspired us with their own DDP YOGA success stories!

DDP Yoga is the evolution of what was formerly the YRG Fitness System, which is best known for what many say is the most dramatic transformation in the health and fitness industry:

Arthur Boorman's incredible transformation story proves to people that not only can almost anyone do DDP YOGA, but that hard work and persistence can lead to incredible results.



What is a Crash Blog without music? Each blog, at the end, will feature the inspirational theme behind the blog title!

This week, it is Doyle Bramhall II's "RICH MAN"! READ THE LYRICS BELOW!

Rich Man -
(written by Doyle Bramhall II and KZ Jones)

Stars turn brilliant
In the centre running low
Everything that we've ignored
Becomes what we want most

I don't want to wait
'Til I know what I'm losing
Certainty of future days
The lazy evolution

And time won't wait for us to live out loud
And time won't wait for absolution

I'm taking care of this moment
I'm not going to let fear take me down
Even when I think I can't go on
Turn my face to gratitude and see truth
And love everywhere

When I'm lonely, I know everything's going to be alright
(You make me feel like a rich man)
Throw my hands up, I got love
And I got everything
(You make me feel like a rich man)
Wow, and I know that

So much living to do here
And no time left for wasting
'Til we see through the hourglass
Ain't it enough to know we're just human

I'm letting go of yesterday
And reaching out for destiny
I ain't going to wait 'til I hear that weaper calling me

When I'm lonely, I know everything's going to be alright
(You make me feel like a rich man)
Throw my hands up, I got love
And I got everything
(You make me feel like a rich man)
When I'm lonely, I got everything to live for
(You make me feel like a better man)
Raise my hands up, save them for the pain that sets me free
(You make me feel like a rich man)
Oh, when I'm lonely
When I'm lonely

This love keeps me moving on, love keeps me moving on
This love keeps me moving on, love keeps me moving on
This love keeps me moving on, love keeps me moving on
This love keeps me moving on, love keeps me moving on
Rich Man (5:23)

Doyle Bramhall II – acoustic and fill guitars, 2nd drum kit left side, vocals

Binky Griptite and Joe Crispiano of the Dap-Kings – electric guitars

Sebastian Steinberg – bass

Carla Azar – main drums

Woody Jackson – L’outer
Alecia Chakour, Binky Griptite, Mila Stribling – background vocals

Christina Courtin – violin

Miranda Sielaff – viola

Caitlin Sullivan – celviola

Special thanks to "TEAM CRASH"....
My apologies if I forget anyone.....
If I did forget someone, blame the four mini strokes I've had since March 2016!

My parents, Omar & Dorothy Crafton!

My "other" family, Josh, Crystal, Andrew, Bret and Parker Smith & Paula Catlin!

"The Power of Fritz"

Jesse Foos

Amy Lewis & Heyzeus KriĆ«ghst

Robbie & Addy Locke


Buzzy James, Trish Burke & Charley Weatherdog!

Wado & Everyone at Buzzy James BuzzTone Studios in Signal Hill, CA.

Rocker Dave & Devon

Mike Malone

Bob Malone of John Fogerty's Band

Jesse James Dupree & Jackyl - I could go for some Jesse James Dupree Bourbon but can't afford it w/ my $27 net worth! ;-(

Mike & Cassie Zeiner

Magz aka Willy Magilla - Stay safe & THANK YOU FOR YOUR CONTINUING. SERVICE!

All my Brothers & Sisters in Blue & Any Emergency Service Provider!

Anthony Gomes & my Soul Family from KS, MO, AR & FLA!


John Fogerty - You were my 1st Favorite "Rockstar" & still are MY #1 BUCKETLIST INTERVIEW! I WILL INTERVIEW YOU, MR. FOGERTY BEFORE I DIE!!!

Patrick Briggs

Darrell Millar & Family

Chip Z'Nuff & Enuff Z'Nuff

Dan Tonegas



"Momma Blues" Karen Kreger-Rouse, Pops, Lisa Rouse and Family!

Fat Kat'z Tattoo in Dodge City, KS.

David, Veda Felix-Hogue and Aunt Marie Felix!

Aunt Flo, Kelly Smith and Family & The Garrison Family.

Travis Chadwick & Jay Smith @ Sinners & Saints Tattoo Co. in Wichita, KS.

Legendary Rock Interviews

Catfish Stew Music & their clients!

The Great Southern Brainfart!

Brit Turner, Blackberry Smoke and all the BBS Brothers & Sisters!

Aunt Debbie Sutton & Family!

Carol Kaye & Kayos Productions

Kymm Britton & 60 Cycle Media

Amanda Cagan & ABC-PR

Chris Rowlison




















The 3 Amigos of Writing....Moon, Don and Ruben!

Luv ya'all & Merry Christmas,